Know what you want to say and make your point quickly. By doing so, it is more likely that the listener  will remember the point you wanted to make. Know why you are having the conversation and what you want to accomplish from it before you begin to speak.

 

The best way to be a good communicator is to be a good listener. Think of your conversation as a tennis match, with each person taking turns serving and receiving, or speaking and listening. When its your turn to listen, do just that. Give the other party your undivided attention. Dont think about what youre going to say next or you may miss something important. When you actively listen, it shows the other person that you value what they have to say. 

 

To gain the most from any communicative interaction, dont ask questions that can be answered with a yes or a no. Instead, ask open-ended questions that will give you more insight into their thoughts. If you arent clear on a point they are trying to make, ask for clarification. It is important to then, restate what you heard and ask them to verify that you received their message correctly. You will be a better friend if you get the facts straight, the first time.

 

Nothing you do will make others feel more important than giving them your full attention. When possible, conduct your interaction in a quiet, peaceful location with a minimum of distractions. Turn off your radio, i-pod, cd player and cell phone. If there are other conversations or events going on in the same room, ignore them. If an unavoidable interruption occurs, excuse yourself and return as quickly as possible. If you must end the conversation due to an unforeseen situation, reschedule for a later time. 

 

Your vocal tone gives the listener a snapshot of your feelings. If you want to show respect, soften your tone. If you find yourself feeling impatient, frustrated or angry during a conversation, make sure your voice isnt reflecting those emotions. If a conversation begins to turn into an argument, consciously lower your volume; often your listener will, too. Keep your voice calm and even whenever possible. You will always be happy with the end result!

 

It is unrealistic to think that everyone will always go along with whatever you request. Disagreements are inevitable. But what do you do when someone disagrees? Do you start an argument, or do you continue to communicate with tact? REMEMBER, tact begins with listening. Be sure you clearly understand the issue and ask questions. Stay calm and think of disagreements as a difference in opinion, not personal rejection. You can understand anothers point of view without agreeing with it. Remember that everyone has a right to their opinion, so respect that and work at finding your common ground  learn to negotiate. If the differences of opinion are over minor issues, work on a compromise. If the disagreement is a matter of principle, you may decide to end the conversation.

 

Dont assume you know everything about a given topic and close off your mind. Instead, relax and allow time to receive vital input from another person. Listen attentively and consider how new ideas may apply to things you already know. If you find someone does know more than you about the topic, don't be afraid to yield control; new information can add to your knowledge, encourage you to study further, or even change your point of view! 

 

Always carry a pen and notepad to jot down thoughts. Record new ideas and items on which you must take action. When you first meet someone, take a moment and jot down key information about the person and the conversation. Make sure you get the correct spelling of their name, and also spell it phonetically. You want to be able to address them correctly the next time you see them. Someone may not notice if you say their name right, but theyll sure notice if you say it wrong! 

 

Studies show that 93% of communication is non-verbal. Make sure you make good eye contact, stand tall, and keep good posture. If you want to let the other person know you agree with them, dont fold your arms tightly cross your legs or turn your body away from the person. Instead, try to match their body positioning; this indicates silent agreement. Make sure your message and your body language match. If there is any discrepancy, people are more likely to believe what your body language is saying than your words. 

 

Theres no need to fill every second of a conversation with sound. Verbal fluff (ah, er, um, like, you know) obscures your message and reduces your credibility. If you feel you are about to use a non-word, take a breath, hold it a moment, and then resume speaking. Use shorter sentences, or pause using silence instead of audible sounds.

 

Communication and personal confidence go hand in hand. The more effectively you communicate your thoughts, the better your outcomes will be. So practice these communication tips and apply them every day. When you do, you’ll communicate comfortably and with confidence.  Strong communication skills will give you the power to become a better person.